Blood of Rome
People believe that they change their beliefs all the time. They do not.
They may change their opinions – in some cases, so fast and so often that Mercury himself could not keep up – but this is a very different thing to changing one’s beliefs.
Creating a new belief is easier, so long as it does not contradict any beliefs one already holds – or, at least, if it does, occurs in situations where the two beliefs do not come into conflict. Overturning or replacing a current belief, however, is a Herculean task.
This, then, is my problem.
My studies point to the idea that what we believe we are is central to what we are. I see the merit in the argument that I have constructed and, on the basis of this, am moving forward with my research. Do I believe that I can change my nature, though – through sheer force of will? Not yet. I do, however, believe that it is possible – and that is a start.
Even granting this, one possibility concerns me. The ‘magi’ referred to in the ancient texts change not just themselves but the world around them with their beliefs. This raises a possibility that I had not considered. What if we are as we are not because we believe but because they do? That is, what if our role is forced upon us by the beliefs of others?
This causes me consternation but, at the same, time, prods me into action. If I am uncomfortable with the idea of being what I am simply because I believe it to be so, then the idea that I am as I am because of someone else’s beliefs provokes an even more passionate desire for freedom from the curses of my kind.
I console myself with the thought that, if the will of the many always outweighed the will of the one then the magi would be powerless as there are always more unbelievers than believers. So, even if our state is dictated by the beliefs of others, there will be ways to overcome this.
I will trust in my strength of mind and train others in the techniques that I am discovering so that our beliefs bolster one anothers’.
I will believe.